Publication date: August, 2008
Script: Dan Berger
Art: Jim Lawson
Lettering: Eric Talbot
Frontispiece: Jim Lawson and Steve Lavigne
Cover: Michael Dooney
“Mined Games”
Summary:
Frontispiece: Braunze, Don and Raph stand together. Braunze thinks to himself just what a hero
is. It can’t be as simply defined as an
individual who strives for the greater good, as many historical villains felt
that their actions were righteous. In
the end, he concludes that he doesn’t have the answer, as even though he
believes in good and evil, his perception of them is cloudy, at best…
Down in the alleys, Braunze is being chased by a pair of
DARPA agents wearing helmets that block his psychic attacks. Braunze radios his associate, Nun, telling her
to keep an eye on Alexia and to wait for his next order.
On the roof of April’s building, the Turtles go about
various activities when suddenly Leo has a dizzy spell and collapses. His brothers rush him inside.
Back in the alleys, the two DARPA agents split up. Braunze manages to take them both out with
his stun gun. Removing the helmet from
one of the guards, he demands answers.
In the apartment, Leo comes to, mumbling about
Nevada. Casey tells Raph that Leo was
going on about Nevada earlier that afternoon.
In the alleys again, Braunze is interrupted by the head
honcho of the scheme: A little Asian girl named Khiyarra. She tells Braunze that she used her own
psychic powers to take control of the DARPA agents; that no one at DARPA has
recovered from Braunze’s massive mind-wipe.
So far as DARPA is concerned, Braunze died in an explosion and they know
nothing of the Turtles. Khiyarra set the
entire encounter up to get revenge for her mentor, Alexia, whom Braunze killed
(and used the entire DARPA incident as a means to cover up her death). Braunze tries to reason with Khiyarra,
telling her that Alexia had been corrupted by her own power and left him no
choice, but Khiyarra isn’t listening. Secretly, Braunze presses a button on his back.
Fully waking up, Leo tells his brothers all about their
adventure in Nevada at the DARPA facility, but they have no memory of it. So far as they’re concerned, after their
fight with Baxter’s robot, they collected the injured Raphael and went straight
home. Leo says that Braunze changed
their memories, and furthermore, he actually saw Braunze watching him from the
street earlier that day. Suddenly, Don
gets a message on his P wave scanner, reading “Send Help Braunze” in Morse code. Leo tells Don to trace the signal.
Khiyarra subdues Braunze with her telekinesis, but
Braunze proves a stronger opponent and resists.
He offers Khiyarra the chance to join his group of “mutants” and reveals
that he didn’t actually kill Alexia.
Khiyarra refuses to believe him, though, and calls in her
reinforcements: Tiabak (Braunze’s purple alien friend with the hammer-head from
Vol. 2) and two Triceraton soldiers (left behind after the Triceraton attack on the DARPA facility). Khiyarra has
brainwashed them into following her orders and fitted them with helmets to
block psychic attacks. Braunze is in
trouble, at least until the Turtles arrive.
They handily defeat the aliens and demand answers.
Braunze apologizes for wiping their memories, saying that
it was a last second decision and he had no other choice. He compliments Leo on his mental strength, as
the Turtle actually restored his own memories without Braunze’s help through
force of will. Two of Braunze’s “mutants”
show up (Bacon and Joni) and order Renee to bring in the chopper to clean up
all the alien mess. Braunze shakes Leo’s
hand and promises that once he’s put Khiyarra away and gotten everything
settled, he’ll return to make amends over a more amicable meeting. Leo accepts his offer.
In some sort of psychic void, Braunze tells Khiyarra that
he has her imprisoned for her own good.
Her mentor, Alexia, had corrupted her, but with rehabilitation she can
be taught to use her powers for the betterment of mankind.
Khiyarra rebels, so Braunze offers a token of good faith: Alexia. Khiyarra and Alexia are reunited, with
Braunze reassuring Khiyarra that he didn’t kill her mentor. He tells them both that if they work
together, they can “destroy the id” and better themselves.
In the physical world, Khiyarra and Alexia’s bodies are
hooked up to some medical gear while their minds rehabilitate in the psychic
realm. Nun wonders if their facility is equipped
to hold two powerful psychics, and Braunze assured her that the psyche
restraints won’t break until both have mastered their emotions. Joni is impressed with Braunze’s work, while
Nun is confused. Bacon verbally
browbeats Nun and the pair argue until the comic ends (revealing a small, secret base in the middle of nowhere).
Turtle Tips:
*Braunze wiped the TMNT’s and Casey’s memories of the
DARPA incident in TMNT (Vol. 2) #13. This
issue picks up immediately where TMNT Volume 2 left off.
*Raph fought the cyborg Baxter Stockman in TMNT (Vol. 2) #8.
*Braunze will return in TMNT (Vol. 4) #8.
*According to Dan Berger’s foreword in this issue,
Braunze was originally conceived as an homage to Doc Savage, though that aspect
of his character never made it through during TMNT (Vol. 2). As such, this issue is a throwback to the
Lester Dent character.
*This issue was originally published with a bonus pin up,
“Goongala Goongala!” by Alex Deligiannis.
Review:
If Volume Two had a mess of an ending, this issue doesn’t
do a very good job of cleaning the whole thing up. In the foreword by Berger, he says that this “epilogue”
was intended to answer all the lingering questions left after Volume Two’s
hasty conclusion, but “Mined Games” hardly addresses anything in need of answering. Really, all it aims to clear
up is “whether the Turtles actually fought aliens at DARPA” or not, and I never
felt that was even a matter of confusion.
Volume Two ends with Leo having vague memories of the battle in Nevada
and Braunze (the psychic guy previously shown to be able to alter minds)
watching the Turtles from the streets with a smirk on his face. Did anybody really think “the end of Volume
Two was just a dream” even after that last sequence? I don’t know how they could.
Really, all “Mined Games” actually accomplishes is
restoring the TMNT’s memories of their battle in DARPA. Or, rather, Leo restores his own memories,
with Braunze promising to come back later and help everybody else out. I guess it’s something.
As for the rest of this issue, holy shit, WHAT? It’s nothing but a barrage of gibberish as Braunze is
caught mid-story running from his own villains, yakking with his own supporting
cast and referencing his own adventures that none of us reading Tales of the
TMNT have ever heard of! I mean, I get
the intent of it; that Braunze is really this totally cool action hero with his
own cast of totally cool teammates and having survived a bunch of totally cool adventures
in his time… but who the fuck CARES?
This is a Ninja Turtle comic, not a Mr. Braunze comic.
The story is referencing events we’ve never seen or even
heard of, with the characters going on and on about it like it shouldn’t be
news to the reader. Yeah yeah, the
aforementioned intent that “Braunze has his own adventures outside of
encounters with the TMNT”, but you know what?
How can we be expected to care about any of these characters or any of
their stories if we’ve never read or experienced any of the events so
frequently referenced? All this shit
about Alexia being this incredibly important individual and Khiyarra going on
about the suffering she endured when she lost her mentor… But I don’t
care. This is the first time I’ve ever
even heard of these characters, the first time ANYONE has, so how can we make
any sort of emotional connection with them?
Worst of all is the end, when Braunze’s gaggle of all-female teammates
start exchanging crude “shtick” back and forth.
It seems meant to show that these characters have diverse personalities
and gimmicky relationships with one another, but again, this is the first and
only time we ever see them. It just rubs
off as cheap one-note writing in lieu of actual personalities (the British one
wears a monocle and speaks in verbose alliteration because she’s British so of
course).
Berger claims that he wrote this issue as a love letter
to the Doc Savage comics (Braunze is even referred to as “Doc” by Nun at one
point), so maybe I’m just not “getting” it because I’ve never read a Doc Savage
comic in my life. Whatever the case may
be, the whole story is as big a mess in 30 pages as the DARPA arc was in 4 full issues. In the
end, it accomplishes very little and the story has next to nothing to do with
the TMNT; they’re reduced to making cameo appearances in their own comic book
just so Braunze and his stable of nobodies can steal the show.
Grade: F (as in, “Foul as the issue may be, Michael
Dooney’s cover is pretty great”.)
