Publication date: July, 1988
Story and art: Mark Martin
“A Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Story”
Summary:
In a warehouse, a little girl offers to tell the reader a story. Before she can,
the “Cowboy Cola” cup she’s drinking from vanishes and she realizes that she
only has a little time left to thank some individuals who helped her. She invites the reader into her time machine (a big white cute) and tells them that they’re going back seven years to just
before she was born.
Seven years ago (the “present”), a purse snatcher makes
off with an old lady’s handbag. The
Ninja Turtles stop him and scare him off, then use the old lady’s pet dog to
return the purse. Leo wanders off
alone to an old warehouse and the time machine appears in front of him. The little girl steps out of the cube and
gives Leo a big hug (much to his surprise).
She expresses familiarity with Leo, but the Turtle has never met her before. Leo fetches his brothers and the little girl
uses that opportunity to shoo the reader out a window before the Turtles can see
them. The other Turtles return and the
little girl gives them each a hug and a kiss and thanks them for
everything. She then climbs back into
her time machine and vanishes.
An instant later, the time machine returns. The Turtles expect the little girl to come
climbing back out, but instead they’re greeted by a small, bug-eyed
creature. The creature says that it’s
from the future and has read all their comic books. It came back in time to ask them for help. The Turtles, more confused than ever, demand
the whole story.
The creature explains that its parents (Bobby and Manda)
live a couple blocks down the street.
Its father is trying to sell his new soft drink, Cowboy Cola, but can’t
get it off the ground. Worse than that,
its mother is pregnant and the couple needs money before the baby is born in two
months. The creature says that to make
ends meet, Bobby will take a job at Maxi Mega Multi Corp Capitalist
Conglomerates doing research into a radioactive serum that will create a
“Master Race”. Bobby will bring home
radiation from that project that will affect the baby in Manda’s womb. The baby will become hyper intelligent and
self-aware even before its birth. Of
course, it will end up being born the deformed creature that it is now.
The creature further explains that after it was born, it
knew that its parents would fear it and the government would want to dissect
it, so it fled to this same abandoned warehouse and spent the next several
years building a time machine. It then
took the time machine back to two months before it was born to enlist the help
of the Ninja Turtles. The creature says
it wants the Turtles to keep Bobby from taking the job at MMMCCC and thus prevent the creature from being pelted with radiation in the womb
(allowing it to be born a normal child).
The Turtles are unsure about helping, as they don’t
think messing with history (even if it’s their present) is a good idea. The creature runs off without them and they
give chase. The creature lures them into
a nearby home where they come face to face with the startled Bobby and Manda. Thinking fast, the Turtles decide to help the
creature out. They tell Bobby that they’re
the welcoming committee from MMMCCC and look forward to seeing him every day at
work. Bobby and Manda faint and the
Turtles sneak back to the warehouse.
At the warehouse, they find the creature, but it’s not
the creature anymore. It’s slowly
transforming into the same little girl that they met earlier. The creature-girl realizes that because the
timeline is changing, it needs to get back to the future ASAP and climbs into
the time machine and vanishes without saying goodbye.
In the future, the little girl (now fully transformed)
steps out of the time machine and pours a drink into a “Cowboy Cola”
glass. The little girl notices that a
stowaway climbed into her time machine before she took off: the reader. She says that she’ll get the reader back to
the present before the time machine vanishes, but first she wants to tell them
a story...
Turtle Tips:
*The story continues in TMNT (Vol. 1) #22.
*Due to scheduling problems, TMNT (Vol. 1) #16 was
released before TMNT (Vol. 1) #15. The
cover correctly dates the issue as July, 1988, but the indicia mistakenly reads
September, 1988.
*TMNT #16 is the first “guest issue” of the series and as
such is non-canon to the ongoing Mirage TMNT storyline. The actual full-on “guest era” will begin
after TMNT (Vol. 1) #21.
*This issue also included a front inside cover with a photo comic starring Mark
Martin acting like a doofus. Backmatter included an ad for Commandosaurs, an ad for Tales of the TMNT #6, an ad for Melting Pot, an ad for TMNT Limited Edition Hardcover collection, an ad for TMNT #15, an ad for the Playmates TMNT toyline, an ad for the Turtle Force Fan Club, and a triple ad for the Dark Horse pewter miniatures, Mirage back issues and the TMNT Limited Edition Hardcover collection. The back inside cover included a Turtle Tracks message from Eastman and a thank you message from Martin. The back cover included a newspaper comic (unrelated to the TMNT) by Martin.
Review:
Although this isn’t technically the start of the “guest
era” of TMNT Vol. 1, it is the first “guest issue” of the series and a
reasonable enough point for me to lay out my feelings about Mirage's polarizing experiment.
By and large, I really don’t care much for the Vol. 1
guest era. On principle, I think it was
an interesting idea, but it went on way too long and rarely lived up to its own
potential. The guest era was initiated
to invite various creators to apply their own unique spin on the TMNT and offer
the audience a wide array of stories and styles linked only by the familiar
characters. What we wound up getting was
a lot of surreal comedy rubbish. Surreal
comedy rubbish by several different creative teams, but it was all surreal
comedy rubbish never-the-less. Michael
Zulli was one of the few creators to interpret “your own take on the TMNT” not
as an opportunity for stupid zany comedy antics, but for a genuine
reinterpretation of the characters and their origins. Nearly everybody else? Surreal comedy rubbish.
And twenty consecutive issues of that can really start to
wear on you.
But that’s my impression of the Vol. 1 guest era as a
whole, looking back at the entire experiment.
This lone issue, all by itself… Now that’s a different matter
altogether.
TMNT #16 by Mark Martin is actually a really cute and
really fun story with a lot of ambitious storytelling methods not just in the
script, but in the art, too. It is a well-crafted comic book and one I admit I didn’t appreciate the first time
I read it (when I associated it with all the surreal comedy rubbish of the
guest era that is positively exhausting to read through).
Martin employs a lot of narrative tricks that are great fun to
wrap your head around. The story “loops”,
ending right where it began and taking the narrative full circle. At first I didn’t really get the need for the
unseen reader gimmick, but later I realized that it was a neat way to get the
audience “involved” in the time travelling shenanigans. When the story begins, “you” aren’t your
present day self, but your future self.
The little girl returns you to the present and sneaks you out a window
and your future self exits the story.
Then, at the end, your present day self stows away on the time machine
and connects to the very beginning of the tale, becoming your future self.
It’s some wild stuff and shows how strange, elaborate and
carefully scripted Martin’s story really is.
Martin’s art also provides some wild variety, as the
little girl is terribly cute and cartoonish while many of her environments look
almost photo-traced for realistic authenticity.
When the Turtles first appear, they’re drawn in the same style as
Eastman and Laird’s cover for TMNT #1 before turning into Martin’s own style
for them. When the creature recounts the
tale of Bobby and Manda, they’re drawn in a simplistic comic strip fashion, but
when the Turtles encounter them, they’re drawn as a detailed parody rendering
of “American Gothic”. Again, there’s a
truly impressive sense of craftsmanship involved in this single issue on all
fronts.
I guess I really only have two criticisms toward this
issue and the first is really more a criticism of the sequels. And the criticism is that the sequels exist. TMNT #16 is a great one-shot, standalone
story, but Martin ends up going back to the well after its run dry and the
sequels boast none of the charm inherent in this story. Sort of like how “Pirates of the Caribbean”
and “The Matrix” are excellent films, but when considered as part of a trilogy
they’re immediately brought down (because those sequels were shit).
My second criticism, and one that really does distract
from the overall quality of this story, is that the Ninja Turtles don’t
need to be there. They’re superfluous to
the plot and it ends up feeling like Martin had a fully formed script or story summary in his head before sitting down to draw this issue and then stuck the
Turtles in there so he could get the exposure from the brand name. What purpose do the Turtles truly serve? As recipients for the creature's/the little
girl’s exposition? The unseen reader
character whom the little girl is constantly talking to fills in that role just
fine. Are they there just to scare Bobby
and Manda away from MMMCCC? The creature
could have done that all on its own by popping in on them the same way the
Turtles did (the only quality of the Turtles that saves the day is that they’re
weird-looking; a quality shared by the creature).
In the end, this is a wonderful story about an adorable,
time travelling little girl, but the Turtles absolutely do not need to be there
and are only included so that this could be a TMNT guest issue.
That aside, it’s still a clever script with a lot of humor
and personality put into the art. It’s a
perfect example of Martin’s storytelling skills and it’s only brought down by being
part of an unnecessary trilogy and by, well, being an awkward Teenage Mutant
Ninja Turtles comic.
